Send
in the Dog
By Jacob Juntunen
By Jacob Juntunen
(JACK sits typing on a laptop, desk covered in papers
which he is collating into piles. JILL enters.)
JILL
Can you believe this weather? In November?
Can you believe this weather? In November?
JACK
Nicest day of the year and I can’t get this stuff into any kind of order. There’s something about a deadline that makes good work impossible.
Nicest day of the year and I can’t get this stuff into any kind of order. There’s something about a deadline that makes good work impossible.
JILL
(holding up a leash) Well, you know who sent me in here.
(holding up a leash) Well, you know who sent me in here.
JACK
The dog did not send you in here.
The dog did not send you in here.
JILL
He suggested we do that loop around Seth Falls.
He suggested we do that loop around Seth Falls.
JACK
If I can’t get my tenure portfolio into some sort of shape, I’m going to be out of a job.
If I can’t get my tenure portfolio into some sort of shape, I’m going to be out of a job.
JILL
You’ll get it.
You’ll get it.
JACK
After the publisher pushed back the publication date on my book? I’m hanging by a thread and if I fuck up this portfolio, that’s it. I’ll have to go back on the job market, and even if I find another job, we’ll have to move again. If we have to pay for that, so much for Jimmy’s private school.
After the publisher pushed back the publication date on my book? I’m hanging by a thread and if I fuck up this portfolio, that’s it. I’ll have to go back on the job market, and even if I find another job, we’ll have to move again. If we have to pay for that, so much for Jimmy’s private school.
JILL
But I made us a picnic. You have to eat. We can just go out to Harvest Point and—
But I made us a picnic. You have to eat. We can just go out to Harvest Point and—
JACK
Getting out to Harvest Point will take at least a couple hours. How about I take a break around 1 and we can eat the picnic in the yard together?
Getting out to Harvest Point will take at least a couple hours. How about I take a break around 1 and we can eat the picnic in the yard together?
JILL
A little exercise will help you get some sleep tonight. You need to be fresh for the tenure interview.
A little exercise will help you get some sleep tonight. You need to be fresh for the tenure interview.
JACK
Finishing this before 2am will help me sleep.
Finishing this before 2am will help me sleep.
JILL
It’s not even noon.
It’s not even noon.
JACK
And I’ve got a lot to do.
And I’ve got a lot to do.
JILL
How many chances do we get at a day like this?
How many chances do we get at a day like this?
JACK
More than chances for tenure.
More than chances for tenure.
JILL
What are we going to say to Jimmy when the dog dies?
What are we going to say to Jimmy when the dog dies?
JACK
The dog’s fine.
The dog’s fine.
JILL
He’s turning 13 next week.
He’s turning 13 next week.
JACK
He’s still got tons of energy, he swims on our hikes.
He’s still got tons of energy, he swims on our hikes.
JILL
It’s six months until spring. Six months is a long time for a dog. How many more days like this are we going to get before then?
It’s six months until spring. Six months is a long time for a dog. How many more days like this are we going to get before then?
JACK
If I don’t get tenure, we can’t keep our son in private school.
If I don’t get tenure, we can’t keep our son in private school.
JILL
You’ve been here five years. They know you. They know your work. They know your book is coming out, it’s just a little late. You can sit and obsess and probably over think all this and mess it up, or you can come out with me and the dog, enjoy the day, clear your head, and do better work.
You’ve been here five years. They know you. They know your work. They know your book is coming out, it’s just a little late. You can sit and obsess and probably over think all this and mess it up, or you can come out with me and the dog, enjoy the day, clear your head, and do better work.
JACK
I don’t have time today to just get out there and enjoy things, okay? There’s too much on the line.
I don’t have time today to just get out there and enjoy things, okay? There’s too much on the line.
JILL
When you feel like you don’t have enough time is when you need to get out there most. To get your perspective right. They know you’re good at your job. You need to relax and you’ll get this done. Come for a hike, you’ll see. Hike for a couple hours with me and the dog, have a little picnic, and then we pick up Jimmy from school— After that, the portfolio will just write itself. And I’ll help you if it doesn’t.
When you feel like you don’t have enough time is when you need to get out there most. To get your perspective right. They know you’re good at your job. You need to relax and you’ll get this done. Come for a hike, you’ll see. Hike for a couple hours with me and the dog, have a little picnic, and then we pick up Jimmy from school— After that, the portfolio will just write itself. And I’ll help you if it doesn’t.
JACK
Give me the leash.
Give me the leash.
Jacob is head of
playwriting at Southern Illinois University, Carbondale.
Read his full lengths here.
Read his full lengths here.
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