Getting Out

 

Getting Out
by Jacob Juntunen

MAN is interrogating WOMAN.

            WOMAN
So I can still get out?

            MAN
Eight years is the maximum sentence for your type. If you convince me you’ve learned, you can walk out of here, head held high. Otherwise, you’re finished.

            WOMAN
But I just need a little more time—

            MAN
It’s eight years to the day. If you can convince me, right now, you can still get out. If not, everything’s over for you.

            WOMAN
What else do you need from me?

            MAN
Say something original.

            WOMAN
I’m sure you’ve heard every kind of desperate plea—

            MAN
I don’t want an excuse for your behavior. I want one original thought. And I’ll let you go.

            WOMAN
But you know how hard I worked in here—

            MAN
Your work while under my supervision has been, frankly, questionable at best. In fact, I looked back at your file to see what you did to get in here, and I was shocked—

            WOMAN
Fine, all right: most Marxists after Lenin argue that imperialism is the highest form of capitalism, that for a capitalist country to continue to make a profit, it must invade places with less developed economies.

            MAN
That’s received wisdom after 1917—

            WOMAN
Right, but my dissertation suggests that imperialism is actually the pioneer of capitalism; I show that the ex-colonies of Britain become capitalist countries after their independence movements, at least to a greater extent than before colonization.

            MAN
And you think that’s an original contribution to the field? Eight years is the maximum time you can take to finish your doctorate here.

            WOMAN
I think arguing that British imperialism contributed to the liberalization of post-colonial economies is quite new, yes.

            MAN
Well, then. Congratulations. You passed your oral exam, Miss Coleman. Or should I say, “Doctor” Coleman?

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